Why getting older hasn’t completely sucked

In as much as growing up has shown me flames and fulfilled the statement/proverb (whatever it is), ‘kura uone’ which my mom loved to say; it hasn’t completely sucked.

7 months having graduated, I still haven’t figured out what it is exactly I want to major in in the publishing industry; textbook publishing definitely being at the bottom of the list. Between this and a whole lotta things, there are reasons why I have enjoyed getting older. Fun fact: I am at that confusing age where you are older but still a child.

Having grown up, its has been EASY TO SPEAK UP. In the previous years it wasn’t really easy to speak, be it with family, friends or whatever. Most probably why most of my relationships (not only romantically) have failed or been shakey. Communication wasn’t my strong point, I would even find it hard to confront someone about something they did which I didn’t like. I would keep distance for a day two until I am over it. I hate fights or arguing and l thought that confrontation will lead to that.

But now I have grown to learn that its possible to address an issue to someone and solve it without getting into a fight of some sort.

PEOPLE ARE ALWAYS GOING TO TALK…no matter what. We human beings are the worst sometimes. I know I am shitty to other people and I probably say and do things that leave them wondering what kind of a person I am. Growing up has led me to understand that that’s just how it is, life must continue.

I remember when I started where I currently work, a guy who stays in our area asked where I will be going every morning and I told him I am employed and to him that was a shock. UGuy wababaza shame (he reaaaaally exclaimed) and I was left confused as to what is shocking about me getting a job. He then continued to say that I got the job because of my father. I was left weak, and he was not the only one to say that. I did not have a great day that day.

I have come to understand that I WILL GO THROUGH THE MOST TERRIBLE TIMES…and that’s how it is. I never liked it when I faced tough times, it never made sense as to why I will go through the things I went through. But I have come to learn that that’s just how life is, its not always going to be gin and lemonade with a fresh slice of lemon and cucumber. And if I am lucky enough; I will learn something from that experience.

When mother passed away, I never thought life would be the same again. And there were other times where bad things kept happening one after the other and not sure how I will be able to pick the pieces up. But you know what? Here I am, gaining weight (even if it’s less than 1 kg) and looking at a prospective romantic relationship.

VALUING MY TIME has been added on the table. No more time spent on some B.S, there are better things to do with my time than waste it on stupid things.  I could sleep, read, eat… I certainly do not have the time to run after people who don’t want to be in my life anymore. People come and go and no matter how much we might want to keep them in our lives, its just not meant to be sometimes. Sticking in toxic and dysfunctional relationships is a thing of the past!

Sis has also appreciated the fact of TAKING IT ONE STEP AT A TIME. Like I already indicted, I am still not sure what to major in in the publishing industry, and I am not going to force it. I already know what I don’t want to do and that is already a step in the right direction right?

In as much as I have changed or learnt a few things in life, I believe I am still the same Fiks(ie) or Fixx(ie) (I honestly don’t know how my nickname is spelt). I am still the same skinny and silly girl I was in 2010 when I laughed at a slice of bread. The same girl who jokes about random things and laughs at herself.

But like we all know it’s not all peaches in the grown-up world, maybe next time I will look at how getting old kinda and sorta sucks.