What I would do if I won the lottery today…

Here I am, a big time winner…now what to do?

First thing I would do is get pregnant. The only thing stopping me from having a baby right now is money. With the little money I make at the moment I am only able to buy gin and lemonade. Okay maybe I am also not emotionally ready to be colonized by my own flesh and blood and I still need to tick my bucket list but with loads of money, it would make it easier. See how not having someone to make me pregnant is not part of the hindrances?…yea its not. I could get pregnant this weekend if I wanted to!

I would enroll for a masters degree and pay my fees in advance. The only thing stopping a sister from being a master is shmoney!!!!…among other less relevant reasons.

If I won the lottery today, I would take my father for shopping. And no, safari clothes and farmer shoes shops will not be the first stop. We would RUN to Frontline Farmers…we would buy stock feed and hay bales for my other siblings; Jamludi, khabhus and company.

If I won the lottery, I would become an owner of my dream home. Do not ask me what my dream home is like because I have not really dreamt that far and Zimbabwe is not inspiring. Growing up I always imagined I would be married at 25, don’t ask me how that is going BUT if I won the lotto today, I will be a homeowner at 25! A house is better than a husband anyway right?! Right?! Right?!

If I won the lottery today, I would set up my OWN dream publishing house. Now this is one dream I can tell you about but that is a story for another day.

Honestly, If I won the lottery today, I would BUY my driver’s license. Yes you read that right. My relationship with the VID hasn’t been a good one and I think buying that metal thing is the best solution for the both of us. Lingang’tsheli nge corruption.

If I won the lottery today, I would invest in something. Gotta make sure the paper keeps coming through. For this I would need the best advice I can ever get because I have the most whack business mind. Its terrible.

If I won the lotto today, I would throw myself a party. This will not be a showing off party but sis has never had a party, ALL MY LIFE. No one, absolutely no one has ever thrown me a party and I don’t know what it feels like to have all your friends and family and gate crushers coming together to celebrate you.

There are a whole lot of other things that I would do if I won the lotto today, traveling, donate to my former high school to renovate the dormitories I stayed in because yho…that was sad, get a car since I would buy the license, spoil the fam and friends, get a new phone because God knows I do need one, pay for my own blog website…the list is a long one.

This may not be exciting, but what would you do if you won the lotto today?